"You can lead a boy to college, but you cannot make him think."
"I was thrown out of college for cheating on the metaphysics exam; I looked into the soul of the boy next to me."
"Commencement speeches were invented largely in the belief that outgoing college students should never be released into the world until they have been properly sedated."
"Yes I'm a bum. But I'm a Harvard bum."
"If a man is a fool, you don't train him out of being a fool by sending him to university. You merely turn him into a trained fool, ten times more dangerous."
"College is a refuge from hasty judgment."

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